Good Negatives

Sometimes it’s nice to be cold.
After a more than a week of insufferable muggy weather, today it’s chilly. I’ve had to put the heating on and I’m even wearing my favourite cardigan. And I’m delighted. I think there’s something very comforting about feeling a little cold, a little vulnerable, afraid that you’ll not quite make it back to perfect cosy balance.

The same applies to negative feelings. Negative feelings are the ones we’re usually more familiar with. We know how to deal with them. They’re like old friends. We tolerate less than perfect relationships. We wear the clothes that hide our bodies away. We feel relief when our bedrooms are messy again (there’s something unnatural about tidy surfaces anyway) and we bicker once more with our partners with secret glee when the making up period has passed (ah, back to normality).

When you’re trying to improve your situation, however, positive feelings of happiness and joy might at first seem “odd” and “unnatural”. But they must be considered small obstacles on the path to betterment. Feeling good about yourself, being honest, open and accepting may also make you feel initially more vulnerable, but isn’t that infinitely more desirable than being trapped in a negative cycle of “I’m sad – I’m used to being sad – so why change”? And besides the awkward newness of the emotions will quickly pass and become part of who you are today, much in the same way that the new haircut which made you so self-conscious at the time becomes a fixture after just one day.

So step outside your comfort zone and dare to try a new way of thinking and acting. Put a new dream into motion. Or do something so simple but so profound: be honest – with yourself. Soon you’ll experience a new feeling. It might be unfamiliar at first. It might not even have a name. But you’ll recognize it by the way others look at you and by the way you’re compelled to check your reflection every five minutes. Happiness may not come naturally. We have to seek it out, believe it and demand it.

Go on – make the choice to be happy today, right now. You’ll never look back!